Bloody Well Write

Here are two words that are often used interchangeably, often when they shouldn’t be: may and might. Dick, Jane and Spot will be our trusty grammar assistants for this tricky subject.

Several rules exist to determine which is the correct word for the purpose. Use may when implying some sort of permission: Dick may eat blueberries while sitting at the kitchen table. Use might when implying some sort of undecided situation: Dick might eat blueberries on the white couch (but he’d be demonstrating extraordinarily poor judgment).

Along these lines, the permission factor throws a kink in the works. Sometimes, even though permission to do something has been granted, if the writing is about not doing it, may is the wrong choice.

Let’s say that Dick has permission to eat blueberries on the white couch. Horrible idea, but allowed nonetheless. And Dick (the smarty-patooty) knows that it would be a baaaad thing to do. But he wants to exercise his right to do what he wants to do, and he wants to let it be known that he — not Jane — is making the decision to not eat blueberries on the white couch; no silly rule would or woman could or would stop him. So he types his Facebook status for all his friends to read: I might not eat blueberries on the white couch. Very nicely put, Dick. For if Dick would’ve typed I may not eat blueberries on the white couch, it might be construed that he was not allowed to eat said blueberries on said white friggin’ couch, because Jane is a nit-picking neat freak. And that just isn’t the case. Dick made the decision. Dick’s the smarty-patooty. Dick knows the difference between may and might.

The likelihood of something happening is another clue to the correct word choice. If it may happen, there’s a greater chance of that thing happening: Jane may eat lunch tomorrow. If it might happen, it could come to be, but the chances are against it: Jane might eat Dick’s lame lunch tomorrow.

One last rule: Might is the past tense of may. When referring to the past, use might: Dick might have eaten blueberries on the white couch (but he told Jane that it was Spot snarfing the forbidden fruit on the ridiculous excuse for a sofa).

See Spot nowhere near couch. See Dick chomp blueberries. See Jane see Dick chomping blueberries. See Dick see Jane seeing Dick. See Dick gulp.

Spot may get doggy treats from Jane. Jane might get couch’s blueberry stains out. Dick is so in the doghouse!

Happy trails!

SAK

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