If I were a boy/rich man/carpenter
It’s funny how the teensiest everyday occurrence can have an influence over at least some minutia of your life. The butterfly effect seems to be more reality than theory. Here’s the latest example from my arsenal, pertaining to was vs. were.
Someone just sent me a link to a cartoon about Jesus being on Twitter. Here’s the exact quote: “I’d consider following Christ if he was on Twitter.” Being the grammar nerd that I am, I posted my comment: “If he WERE on Twitter. Sorry to be a grammar downer.”
So when exactly do you use was instead of were, and vice versa?
Was
Use was when something probably could happen or is probably true:
• If my dog was to sleep all day
• If your fresh-baked cookie was to disappear
• If the toothpaste lid was to get all gunked up
Were
Use were if whatever you’re talking about is theoretical, probably couldn’t happen or probably not true:
• If I were a boy (not taking into consideration a sex change, this ain’t gonna happen)
• If I were a rich man (I’d like to think that the only thing stopping me on this one is the “man” part, but it’s hard to predict the future of my bank account)
• If I were a carpenter (I played with power tools in college but am not going to switch careers this late in the game)
I’m sure there are some out there who believe that Christ may very well be on Twitter and is just about to post a new 132-character status. And those folks can believe as they wish. I’m just thinking that it’s a long shot he’s actually signed up and posted a profile pic. So were is the most logical choice for the cartoon.
The number of folks you’re talking about doesn’t matter, either. You can correctly say, “If I were a rich man,” “If she were a rich man” and “If those gals were rich men.” They all get were, regardless of how many are in the party.
Hope this cleared up the was vs. were issue. Just remember: Beyoncé knows the difference. So does Tevye, Robert Plant and, back in the day, Bobby Darin. Or at least their songwriters did. And if they can sing it from the rooftops, so can you.
Happy trails!
SAK
Tags: Beyonce, editing, grammar, Robert Plant, theoretical, Twitter, Was vs Were, writing
Instead of “If I were a carpenter”, how about “Were I a carpenter”?
Isn’t good writing about ridding oneself of unnecessary words?!!
Please advise on this:
“Everyone should take their swimsuits.”
or
“Everyone should his/her swimsuit.”
Yes, that’s a good point. But the entry’s title is based on three songs (”If I Were a Boy,” “If I Were a Rich Man” and “If I Were a Carpenter”). It’s not my place to change titles of songs. “Unnecessary” can be subjective; some would say that adjectives in general are not completely necessary. But sometimes those extra words make the piece interesting.
Thanks for your question! It should be “Everyone should take his or her swimsuit.” The word everyone implies the singular (every one), and so it calls for a singular adjective (his or her), as well as a singular object (swimsuit).
[...] 25, 2009 · No Comments Were or was? Grammar aid for those of us who are [...]
Wow. I sit corrected.
All this time (for me, some 47 years on ol’ planet Earth), I had been under the impression that the distinction between “was” and “were” was temporal. That is, “was” for things clearly in the past, “were” for things that may or may not occur in the near or far-flung future.
And, what’s worse, my usual go-to tome for such matters, “The Elements of Style,” is woefully silent on the subject. At least, as far as I can find without yet another cover-to-cover reading — “was” versus “were” is not in the index.
Learn something new every day!
Thanks for you comment! Here’s a little something about the subject from The Society for the Promotion of Good Grammar (SPOGG).
My two go-to references are the AP Stylebook and “Lapsing Into a Comma” by Bill Walsh. Walsh is a fun writer who follows AP but expands on the points that AP doesn’t cover.