Bloody Well Write

I have two pet peeves for this entry, really.

The first one stems from how I came to decide what to write about today. I was standing in the shower thinking, and I had all these great phrases and sentences and points running through my head. But I was standing in the shower, hair full of shampoo and soapy puff in hand, and there was no way I could easily record these fantastic ideas.

Try to remember them? Oh, sure — easy for you to say, sitting there all dry and all. You know how it goes: Great idea pops into your head, it’s completely developed and ready for a patent, but by the time you’re towel-dried and undies on, your mind is blank. You don’t have a recorder handy in the bathroom, and pen to paper completely is out of the question.

So that’s my pet peeve No. 38: How in tarnation do people expect to get great ideas and keep those great ideas intact until they’re out of the shower? Umph.

Now on to pet peeve No. 39, the point of this entry: quality.

What does that mean? I see it all the time: This is a quality product. That is quality-made. The other is a quality idea.

What kind of quality, pretty please? High quality? Low quality? Supreme quality? So-so quality?

There are those who would argue that I am being too picky and not letting myself read into it what is meant to be read into it. I argue back: I am a writer. And an editor. And a proofreader. My job is to be picky with the language, to make entirely sure that the point is clear (and concise, yes, but clarity rules the writer’s roost).

If the wording isn’t absolutely clear to me, I can guarantee you that there are others out there who would also find it confusing as is. And if I don’t question language that is not quite clear (especially as an editor and proofreader), then who will? The readers, that’s who. And if the readers are questioning the wording, then it’s a little too late for the writer to clarify.

The readers have power — political power, emotional power, purchasing power.

Even if the readers “get” your meaning, there are some who will relate the slightly sloppy writing with the product. Do you really want even a few of your readers to mock your writing (and thus your product, if you are selling something) by thinking, “Hmm. I wonder if the bozo who wrote this copy (snicker) meant “crappy quality” or (tee hee) “subpar quality” (har dee har)”? No. Of course you don’t. So be clear when you’re writing about the quality of something.

It’s crafted of high-quality mahogany.

It’s a low-quality grape.

It’s the best quality that money can buy.

Happy trails!

SAK